The Shadow-gloom and Weight of the Sacred

One aspect of culture stress/reverse culture stress is a judgmental attitude toward the culture in which you are living. When we went through culture stress after moving to VIenna, we would often judge the Viennese culture for being different than American culture. Or, I would judge, in any event. Banking is done differently. Shopping at the grocery store is done differently. Time is different in Vienna. People just work at a pace that is, from an American perspective, much too casual to be effective. Nothing is accomplished in a timely fashion (again, "timely" from an American perspective). These things, as we were told in preparation for culture stress, are not a matter of right or wrong. They're just different. For the Viennese, they're not slow or casual about how they go about their work, they're just normal.

Eventually, I grew to accept the differences in the two cultures. I not only accepted the differences, I actually began to accept the Austrian way of life. I like the way Austrian banks operate better than the way American banks operate. I would try to explain the differences, but I don't think konto or bankomat will mean anything to either of my readers. Besides, I'm not going for Most Boring Blog Post Ever, though I may attain this accolade nonetheless. I most certainly accepted the Austrian sense of time. It is just a much more pleasant way to live. Of course, it was one of those things that was difficult to explain to people in the States. For example, it is almost impossible to point to anything during the month of August as an accomplishment, something completed. People go on holiday, and I mean holiday. It's a great time for vacation or planning what to do when people return from holiday, but just day-to-day, week-to-week tasks? No, you're just wasting time. You can't really explain that to people who haven't experienced it because they understand and judge from their experience sitting in the U.S.

Coming back the States, I now find myself often judging my native culture. In OKC, church is a big part of the culture. Not only that, it's always been a big part of my life--for better or worse. Sometimes, people would ask me about "my call." Specifically, to Vienna. I'll ignore the incredulously bad reading of "call" narratives in Scripture that allows such questions and simply say I hated them. I would half-jokingly respond with something like, "I don't really know, man. I don't even like going to church." This is true: Sunday morning is generally the most miserable part of my week. It was this way prior to living in Vienna and it's that way now. I liked Sunday mornings slightly better while in Vienna just because of what we were attempting, but I wouldn't say it was a relief. The thing that gets me, the thing about which I'm struggling with being judgmental--overly judgmental--is that Christianity is simply an academic exercise. Being a Christian or not being is a Christian is the equivalent to adhering to a Newtonian model of the universe or an Einsteinian model of the Universe. (I don't think anyone adheres solely to a Newtonian model any longer, or the static universe for that matter. But, I don't know that much about physics.) If I adhere to Newton's model, Einstein's model, Hubble's model, or Aristotle's model, it doesn't matter. I'm not calculating the trajectory of satellites. Whatever model of the universe I might accept, it doesn't matter. It's just academic, maybe even fun, but ultimately, for me, it's just a matter of thinking.