The Shadow-gloom and Weight of the Sacred

There's been a lot of drama about Calvin Johnson's non-touchdown in the Lions-Bears game last Sunday. (You can click here to watch a clip of the event at issue.) I thought lending my own expertise to the issue couldn't hurt. After all, Herr Megatron is one of my receivers in fantasy football and had that final play been called a touchdown, I wouldn't have lost the first game of the season (to Gretchen) 65-66.

Fantasy football aside, I think the play should have been ruled a touchdown. I guess most people feel that way, but I have bigger complaints than this single play. My complaint is the hypocrisy of the end zone. Consider Matt Hasselbeck's one-yard TD run on Sunday. (Click here to watch.) You see this all the time in the NFL: a player runs with the ball towards the pylon as he is pursued by the defense, he thrusts his arm forward so that the ball "breaks the plane" between the end zone and regular field of play and a touchdown is the result. Only the ball needs to get there. Hasselbeck doesn't have to get two feet in the end zone, he doesn't have to down a knee, nor does must he follow his pylon-sweeping gesture with an additional "football move." All that needs to happen is for Hasselbeck to break the plane with the football in order to score a touchdown.

But, if Calvin Johnson is already in the end zone and catches the ball the "break the plane" rule is not applicable. He has to land two feet on the ground while maintaining possession and, apparently, followed by an additional "football move." (I'm not sure what exactly constitutes an additional "football move," but I imagine removing a Sharpie from one's sock and autographing the football would count.) If a plane does in fact exist between the regular field of play and the end zone, then it stands to reason that the second Calvin Johnson catches the ball he should be awarded a touchdown. The touchdown would exist even if he were in the air, before landing on the ground. If Matt Hasselbeck's touchdown existed the moment the ball broke the plane, this means the play is over at that moment. If a defender would have knocked it out of his hands or if Hasselbeck had simply lost control of the ball after the plane was broken, it would be moot. The play is over once a touchdown is scored and a touchdown is awarded once the ball breaks the plane...except when throwing to a receiver already in the end zone. In this case, there is no plane.

Detroit would have been better off had Calvin Johnson's route gone along the one-yard line so that when he fell he would have fallen into the end zone, breaking the plane, scoring a touchdown, ending the play. Then, no matter what happens after the plane is broken (drop the ball, complete an additional football move, etc.), a touchdown is scored. The Detroit Lions would have won the game. And for that matter, so would have the Gob Bluths--my fantasy football team.